Leviticus

"As for the live bird, he shall take it together with the cedar wood and the scarlet string and the hyssop, and shall dip them and the live bird in the blood of the bird that was slain over the running water" -Leviticus 14:6

I understand through the book of laws that I should live, not by optimism, but by faith. I do understand that there may be good in this decision that was made upon me. 

But a bird in my heart was torn into two; that bird lies there and refuses to mend.

The live bird was dipped in the blood of the torn.

I smell its blood.

The scent is too fragrant, I cannot stop my tears.

I understand that in the grand scheme of things, a couple of years will not ruin my life.

Sensitivity is the trademark of immaturity, and I understand why this is inevitable.

But I lie here and refuse to heal.

I will lie hear in the pool of my own watery blood.

And I will hurt, and hurt, and hurt, and hurt

until the tears wash off the remnants of my dead bird off my sheets.